The rain has stopped. I must admit I enjoy a good, heavy, dark rain every now and again. It seems like everyone slows down a bit when it rains. You don't have to feel quite so guilty just sitting around cuddled under blankets with a book when it's raining.
But the sun is out and the business of life must go on. Procrastinating here, putting off yet another application drop off. This time it's the Union Bluff Hotel in York, Maine which isn't as far away as it sounds. Southern coastal Maine dips down almost hitting Massachusetts, leaving New Hampshire with a teenie tiny coastline. So it's really only a twenty minute drive to York, I've been told anyhow. I try not to drive around too much since I STILL don't have a valid driver's license. Hence another reason I need a job. I've paid off all the fines I owed but in order to be reinstated I need a special kind of insurance called an SR-22. Anyone ever heard of it? It's bullshit. Basically everyone I talk to about it, including the court system and the insurance companies themselves, don't seem to be able to give me a reasonable explanation of what it is. The best I can tell from the mumble jumble I've been served is that it's personal insurance basically. Insurance on myself because, apparently, I suck and am not to be trusted. But no one can seem to tell me for how long I need to have this. And it's super expensive. So if I lost my license because I couldn't afford the fines does it seem probable that I will be able to afford this crappy, unnecessary, over-priced insurance? So until I can save up the initial fee to get started I have to find a job and drive there unlicensed, praying to God I don't get pulled over just a little bit longer. It's an awful feeling. The constant anxiety couldn't be healthy. But what choice do have? I'm lucky I have what I have.
Part of the reason I was stuck with Mike for so long was because I needed the car. My Mom wants to go away all the time and it's her car so what do I have to stand on there? Other than the fact that she harped at me to ditch Mike, promising all the while that if I did she would back me up until I got on me feet. But apparently I am not getting there fast enough. Shit, it's like the worst time to be looking for a job. People with Master's Degrees are applying for the same fricken Friendly's Restaurant as me. I'm not even calling ahead today so they don't have a chance to blow me off. Maybe if I dress exceedingly well and have a big smile they will give me an interview. It's for a front desk/hostess position. It would be perfect for me since I hate manual labor. Just writing stuff/typing reservations, answering phones, being polite to people - I can DO that! For sure. Perfect. I really hope they hire me. I'd much rather work there than at Friendly's. Everyone pray for me!!!!